Ex- England captain Lewis Moody has disclosed he has been diagnosed with motor neurone disease and stated he cannot yet confront the full implications of the muscle-degenerating condition that claimed the lives of other rugby players Doddie Weir and Rob Burrow.
The 47-year-old athlete, who was a member of the World Cup champion 2003 side and won several English and European titles with Leicester, gave an interview to BBC Breakfast two weeks after learning he has the condition.
"There's something about facing the future and not wanting to completely absorb that at the moment," he commented.
"It isn't that I am unaware of where it's progressing. We understand that. But there is absolutely a reluctance to look the future in the face for now."
Moody, talking with his wife Annie, explains rather he feels "at ease" as he concentrates on his current wellbeing, his family and making preparations for when the disease deteriorates.
"Possibly that's trauma or maybe I handle situations in another way, and once I have the information, it's more manageable," he continued.
Early Signs
Moody found out he had MND after noticing some weakness in his upper arm while working out in the gym.
After rehabilitation failed to improve the condition, a series of scans revealed nerve cells in his brain and spinal cord had been compromised by MND.
"You receive this medical finding of MND and we're rightly extremely moved about it, but it's quite odd because I sense that I'm perfectly healthy," he added.
"I don't feel sick. I don't feel unwell
"My symptoms are very minor. I have a bit of muscle deterioration in the hand and the upper arm.
"I continue to be able to performing all activities. And optimistically that will persist for as long as is attainable."
Disease Progression
MND can develop quickly.
Based on the non-profit MND Association, the disease takes the lives of a one-third of people within a year and over half within two years of detection, as ingestion and respiration become increasingly challenging.
Medical care can only retard worsening.
"It isn't ever me that I am upset for," added an affected Moody.
"It's the grief around having to inform my mum - as an sole offspring - and the implications that has for her."
Household Effect
Conversing from the household with his wife and their pet dog by his side, Moody was consumed with emotion when he mentioned informing his sons - 17-year Dylan and 15-year-old Ethan - the heartbreaking news, stating: "It was the toughest thing I've ever had to do."
"These are two wonderful boys and that was rather upsetting," Moody remarked.
"We positioned ourselves on the sofa in crying, Ethan and Dylan both wrapped up in each other, then the dog leapt across and commenced licking the tears off our faces, which was quite silly."
Moody said the focus was remaining in the present.
"There exists no solution and that is why you have to be so intensely directed on just welcoming and enjoying everything now," he commented.
"As Annie said, we've been very fortunate that the sole decision I made when I retired from playing was to allocate as much duration with the kids as feasible. We can't reclaim those years back."
Athlete Connection
Elite competitors are unevenly affected by MND, with investigations suggesting the rate of the condition is up to 600% elevated than in the wider community.
It is believed that by reducing the oxygen obtainable and causing harm to motor neurone cells, regular, vigorous exercise can activate the illness in those previously predisposed.
Athletic Career
Moody, who earned 71 England caps and toured with the British and Irish Lions in New Zealand in 2005, was nicknamed 'Mad Dog' during his playing career, in recognition of his brave, relentless style to the game.
He played through a stress fracture of his leg for a period with Leicester and once sparked a training-ground scuffle with colleague and friend Martin Johnson when, annoyed, he abandoned a tackle pad and commenced engaging in collisions.
After coming on as a reserve in the Rugby World Cup final win over Australia in 2003, he claimed a ball at the rear of the set piece in the decisive phase of play, setting a platform for scrum-half Matt Dawson to attack and Jonny Wilkinson to execute the victory-securing field goal.
Backing System
Moody has already notified Johnson, who led England to that title, and a handful of other ex- colleagues about his condition, but the rest will be finding out his news with the remainder of public.
"There shall be a moment when we'll need to rely on their assistance but, at the present, just having that kind of love and acknowledgment that people are present is what's important," he stated.
"This game is such a excellent family.
"I told to the kids the other day, I've had an extraordinary life.
"Even should it ended now, I've enjoyed all of it and welcomed all of it and got to do it with exceptional people.
"When you get to call your passion your career, it's one of the most significant blessings.
"Achieving this for so long a duration with the teams that I did it with was a joy. And I understand they will desire to support in any way they can and I await having those conversations."
